Skip to main content

What My First Job Taught Me & Why I didn't Learn Anything From It

When I first started my career, I made some grand assumptions about how I would transform the world, make it a better place and not compromise on my ideals or the values that define me as a person.

One year into my first job, I saw through my stupid notions and knew it is all bullocks! You know there is nothing else you can really do but turn a blind eye to the small-skirted, hardly-can-write-a-sentence, cleavage showing girl who is definitely closer to the top brass/caucus than you can ever possibly be. Even her voice, which when she talks to a person of the same gender is sharp like a seagull's mean cry, becomes - the most and only accurate way to put is like this - sexually provocative as though she is in the middle of an act...it's exactly what can turn the toughest man into mush in minutes. I have seen this happen countless times and wished a thousand times I didn't exist to see this repeat itself over and over again. 

But especially in the field of law and print book publishing, men will be men and there are women who know exactly how to leverage it at the workplace. Sadly, the women aren't really women anymore. 

When I joined my first job, I met and trained many freshers from law college - ambitious, smart and all set to conquer the world by hook or crook. It's no longer about right or wrong. It's about getting the life of your dreams and trampling over other people's hard work and dreams too. 

The paradox remains that there are still women like me who believe that hard work, commitment, integrity and sincerity at the workplace are all that it takes to excel at work. I believe it is even when the world, during my first job, reflected something else altogether.

No, I am not being sarcastic here. I am telling you what is happening in many workplaces. And in this post, I am sharing what I refused to learn from my first workplace.

In the days thereafter, you learn the art of pretending to be blind everytime the chick falls on her knees spangled in  a most embarassing way in front of the management comprising (obviously) of males and you know that your principled stand and professional attitude are definitely not going to impress in comparison. At best, it will bring about some boring yawns. By the end of the first year, you even master the zen of maintaining icy silence to survive your first job and many that come thereafter. You change nothing in the process - except yourself and tweak the idealistic person you once happened to be.

But still some people like me are so nutty they won't mend their ways. They continue to be humble even around the young chicks that come out of college, chewing bubble gum at the workplace and rings on not just their nose but chin, navel and waist and you sigh as you learn to balance your humility with their 'we-know-it-all-because-we-need-less-clothes' attitude.

If you actually wear clothes to work more than skin, learn to lose gracefully to those who know next to nothing but they think do. And yes, they know the game better than you do because it takes a great deal of relentless practice to have the cleavage angle perfectly turned out. I mean, how many of you can get it right every time? I doubt it. It takes relentless practice and razor sharp timing.  Admit it, it is more superior to any thing you can possibly conjure up in your own head such as creativity or innovation!

Still I wouldn't go that route. It's just not me.

And if you don't believe me yet, trust me. I know many people like that from my first job. They are smarter, more successful and know what it takes to reach the highest positions in the shortest span of time. They embrace life with no regrets. Unfortunately, I learned nothing valuable from them and continue to be the old-fashioned professional that I am.  

By the way, I can guess your next question. Here's my answer: I don't remember which company that I had joined first...pun intended! 


Funny, I have no regrets about being me. Right now where I am, I am very happy. Isn't it all that matters? 

Comments

Asha said…
This post goes to show what a strong moral foundation you have been raised with. Great swapna, These are not even things worth learning.

I see around me such type of people too. funnily these women allow their teen children also to dress up by wearing skimpier dresses and cleavage showing tops. To them, it is considered feminist, progressive and fashionable.
AM Zafaran said…
Your post is not only a great read, but so true too! Yet, I feel, the cleavage touting females will not figure anywhere in the horizon when actual, real intellectual work needs to be done. There will come a moment of recognition of chaff from grain!

Most Popular Posts

The Ugly Truth about Caste in Kerala

Many years ago, when I wrote this post on Kerala's caste system, I had not considered that people would start sending in abusive comments about one caste over the other. It baffles me that this is how Indians, all of us, continue to judge each other on account of caste differences.  [ READ: Guru Kripa: Powerful Lessons at the Lotus Feet ] My question is - why do you ABUSE any caste or community? I suggest that you read about the lives of great Masters and their stories - none of them judged anyone on the basis of caste.  You can read the life stories of Sri Adi Shankara Bhagawadpada, Tulsidas, Jnaneshwar, Namadev, Sri Aurobindo, Sri Ramakrishna, Swami Paramahansa Yogananda, Shirdi Sai Baba, and many more Gurus in Sanathana Dharma. NONE of them endorse these caste hierarchies in Bhakti Marga. Assuming that Guru Sampradaya does not appeal to your sensibilities, do read this  new book 'Ants among Elephants' written by Sujatha Gidla, who writes about herself as being bor...

How do you light Deepam at home?

How do you light deepam at home? As a child, I loved watching the ritual of my grandmother lighting the deepam or the traditional lamp at home in the evenings. A sense of serenity accompanied her frail figure as she would carefully straighten every wick, dip it into the tiny puddle of oil and light the lamp. As my grandmother would read out the scriptures and chant the prayers, the fragrance of incense sticks and flowers added depth to the experience. In many Hindu homes nowadays, the lighting of the lamp (or the nilavilakku, as Malayalis refer to the traditional lamp in their homes) is not a regular practice. A lot of people have many questions around how to light deepam at home and which oil to use and so on. An important point to keep in mind - Maintain physical cleanliness and hygiene while lighting the lamp. Wear clean clothes while lighting the lamp. Frequently Asked Questions About Lighting Deepam at Home Collating most queries related to how to light the deepam at home, I'v...

Gayatri Mantra as Panchamukhi: Get it right or let it go

Most people do not understand the importance of chanting the Gayatri mantra because they are not aware of its power. It is only when I began to read Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba's teachings that I learned how sacred and powerful the chanting of the Gayatri mantra is.    The Vedas represent the breath of God. The Gayatri mantra is the very basis of the Vedas. Try not to undertake chanting the Gayatri mantra as a light endeavor or as a hobby. It has to be chanted with faith, discipline and purity of mind and body. Be steady with your sadhana if you want to reap the spiritual dividend associated with the Gayatri mantra  and never once hesitate once you decide to do it.  Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba said that the Gayatri Mantra is referred to as Pancha Mukhi, the Goddess with five faces that represent the five pranas or life forces. Here's more on it. .  Also read: The Power of OM   Chant the Gayatri Mantra correctly: Pause Five Times Here a...

Amazing Signs You are an Earth Angel

Doreen Virtue’s book, “Assertiveness for Earth Angels” brings to life the reality of Earth Angels in very easy way. It’s an exciting must-read!   Enjoyed reading this? Then,  do subscribe to my Substack newsletter! Who are Earth Angels? Earth Angels have amazing superpowers in: Music Arts Writing Healing Manifesting miracles for others such as controlling weather conditions and  becoming invisible at will. How to Identify Earth Angels by their Traits To know whether you are an Earth Angel, take a look at their known traits that are explained in this book: You have a graceful and compassionate aura that inspires people . Your presence “lifts” everyone to happier spirits – it is proof of who you really are. You don’t judge others but you overdo the “acceptance” bit. So, you tolerate even those who show no respect for boundaries. You cannot stand anyone suffering or being in pain. You are constantly “rescuing people” because it...

Saree Woes 2

Our earlier discussion on Saree Woes really perked up my spirits. A big thanks to all of you for pepping me up. Okay, here's the good news. There was an unexpected late night party that I had to attend in Gurgaon. To be honest, I haven't had the time or energy to attend any such parties after Adi was born. I was sure I wouldn't have the confidence to make conversation with the glitterati, let alone feel confident to carry off wearing a saree. This is one of those parties where you have to be dressed very formally. Well, at the end of a working woman's day, you hardly feel ready to attend one of these parties looking like a moron, right? So, with very little preparation and very few hours left, I called on all the gods in Heaven to help me look a little younger and prettier since I don't have the magic to look young all on my own. Although I was tempted to wear one of my awesome Kancheevaram treasures, I knew it would be very difficult to drape it without any h...