Skip to main content

Book Review: Ships that Pass by Shashi Deshpande


Be ready for an intense emotional, literary upheaval as you get more and more involved in this story. Let me warn you, the story is slow paced. The story line is simple: it takes you through the life and emotions of Radhika who surprises her family by declaring (much to their disappointment) that she is done with studying and that she wants them to find a suitable groom for her. She feels disappointed by their lukewarm reaction and is in a hurry to get married, probably because she feels bored and has nothing special she wants to do in life and marriage, as the society often points out, seems like a perfect solution.   



Except that when she meets Ghanashyam, the ‘suitable’ groom, she is not too comfortable with the way they act their roles and try to be individuals they aren’t with each other. She behaves artificially with him and it makes her wonder whether two strangers who are playacting with one another can possibly make a marriage work in a spirit of love and understanding.  

During the time this confusion sets in her mind and she begins questioning herself on the very purpose of getting married, she receives a letter from her brother in law Shaan whom she is closer to than her beautiful, near perfect older sister, Tara. The letter disturbs her as it urgently asks her to come and stay with them for a few days as Tara is apparently not well and not communicating even to Shaan.

So, a determined younger sister packs her things and comes to stay with her older sister whom she hardly knew, liked or understood while they were growing up. What she discovers in her sister’s near perfect life devastates her. She begins to think seriously and questions emerge in her mind:

  1. So called ‘perfect’ couples as perceived by the society – does anyone even have a clue what their real, pain filled lives are like? What is the point of creating an illusion like that and living it for the rest of one’s lives?
  2. Is marriage a riddle that others can never understand? Why?
  3. What creates a perfect marriage?

At the time she is staying with her sister, she meets Ram Mohan, her sister’s old friend and loyal admirer. She is irritated by his adoration and close friendship with her beautiful sister but she also believes he is extremely kind, compassionate and sincere. Gradually, she begins to trust him and in certain moments of distress, she finds herself turning to him and relying on his judgement than that of any others.

As she grapples with the crumbling relationship between her brother in law and her sister, she finds herself becoming closer to her sister, whom she had always been envious of. Closer up, she realizes her sister’s life had been far from easy and completely different from what every one else had expected or anticipated it to be. From outside, her sister’s marriage looked perfect. Except that from inside, there was nothing left, not even anger, bitterness or indifference. It was like an empty box.

In moments of despair, Radhika turns to Ram Mohan who is older and wiser by several years.

One of his profound statements underlies the core of this novel and this reads:

“Marriage is a very strange thing. It’s a very public institution, it’s meant to tell the world that two people are going to live together, to declare that their children will be legal, that these children can inherit their property. It’s meant for social living, to ensure that some rules are observed so that men and women don’t cross the lines that are drawn for them. At the same time, marriage is an intensely personal affair. No outsider will ever know the state of some one else’s marriage. It’s a closed room, a locked room.”

This book is beautifully written, emotionally provocative and is a perfect read for those who enjoy literary fiction. Best of all, this is a book that questions all your beliefs, myths and details that populate the institution of marriage as it happens among Indians.

It makes you reflect, contemplate and ask, “What makes a marriage perfect? Will it work for me? If so, how can I be so sure?”

You won’t regret reading this book though it’s priced higher at Rs. 295 and spans 136 pages.

Comments

Unknown said…
Hmm.....Indian author books take a while to get to the US, I think... Nevertheless, shall watch out for this one.

Most Popular Posts

The Ugly Truth about Caste in Kerala

Many years ago, when I wrote this post on Kerala's caste system, I had not considered that people would start sending in abusive comments about one caste over the other. It baffles me that this is how Indians, all of us, continue to judge each other on account of caste differences.  [ READ: Guru Kripa: Powerful Lessons at the Lotus Feet ] My question is - why do you ABUSE any caste or community? I suggest that you read about the lives of great Masters and their stories - none of them judged anyone on the basis of caste.  You can read the life stories of Sri Adi Shankara Bhagawadpada, Tulsidas, Jnaneshwar, Namadev, Sri Aurobindo, Sri Ramakrishna, Swami Paramahansa Yogananda, Shirdi Sai Baba, and many more Gurus in Sanathana Dharma. NONE of them endorse these caste hierarchies in Bhakti Marga. Assuming that Guru Sampradaya does not appeal to your sensibilities, do read this  new book 'Ants among Elephants' written by Sujatha Gidla, who writes about herself as being born

How do you light Deepam at home?

How do you light deepam at home? As a child, I loved watching the ritual of my grandmother lighting the deepam or the traditional lamp at home in the evenings. A sense of serenity accompanied her frail figure as she would carefully straighten every wick, dip it into the tiny puddle of oil and light the lamp. As my grandmother would read out the scriptures and chant the prayers, the fragrance of incense sticks and flowers added depth to the experience. In many Hindu homes nowadays, the lighting of the lamp (or the nilavilakku, as Malayalis refer to the traditional lamp in their homes) is not a regular practice. A lot of people have many questions around how to light deepam at home and which oil to use and so on. An important point to keep in mind - Maintain physical cleanliness and hygiene while lighting the lamp. Wear clean clothes while lighting the lamp. Frequently Asked Questions About Lighting Deepam at Home Collating most queries related to how to light the deepam at home, I'v

Tumhari Sulu movie review: Vidya Balan makes you laugh, cry, croon and fall in love with 'Sulu'

I have always looked forward to watching Vidya Balan's films, which is why I watched her latest one, Tumhari Sulu, and decided to share this movie review. I read many reviews which bring in the feminist aspect of the narrative. I want to look at the little details of an ordinary life that are portrayed by Vidya Balan's extraordinary acting.   As ''Sulu'', Vidya Balan breathes life into the character of bubbly housewife, whose life revolves around her husband, son and of course, her favorite hobby of participating in all kinds of contests and winning them with a die-hard spirit.                                          [ Image: Vidya Balan's Facebook page ]                                Vidya Balan's mastery over details comes through in every scene - shooing off birds so that they don't put ''potty'' on her clothes, posing in front of the mirror with the kind of bag that working women use and pretending to be one, and eve

7 Am Arivu (the Seventh Sense) - Why it is spiritually relevant

7 Am Arivu (the Seventh Sense) is a film that I was desperate to watch for two reasons. One, I am a Suriya fan and I had heard so much about his performance in this movie that I didn't want to settle for watching a CD of it and losing the actual cinematic experience. Second, I had read from various bloggers and their reviews that this film revolves around the story of Bodhidharman, a 16th century prince from Tamil Nadu who had mastered knowledge spanning multiple forms of art, and was sent to China to save the people from evil. Once he goes there, the transformation begins for himself and for the people there and he  goes on to become Damo, the father of Shaolin and Kung Fu and hypnotism and such other mystical yet spiritually relevant forms of mind mastery. 7 Am Arivu Goes Over the Top with the Dravidian Rhetoric In 7 Am Arivu, there has been a lot of controversy created by the fact that nearly every character eulogizes about the importance of being Tamil and yes, the Dravidi

Vidyarambham: How and why Malayalis celebrate writing the words ''Harisree Ganapathaye Namaha"

For Malayalis, Vidyarambham is an auspicious day on which the elders and children mark the day by writing the sacred words, "Harisree Ganapathayeh Namaha." The observance of this ritual may differ from region to region, community to community and family to family. Whatever I share here is based on how vidyarambham is celebrated in my home.   [READ: What is Vidyarambham?] Vidyarambham: How Malayalis observe this sacred day In families where the children are gearing up to enter pre-school or play school and are not yet ready to join the formal schooling system, Vidyarambham marks an important occasion for an elder to introduce them to the world of "vidya" or "knowledge." The words ''Harisree Ganapathayeh Namaha" are written on the child's tongue by the grandparent, an elder or parent.                                        [Image credit: Travel Manorama Online ] Vidyarambham: Why it matters  An interesting aspect of Vidyarambha