Woooohoooo, 2020 begins! How swiftly 2019 whizzed by! This is a good time to reflect on what the year brought for most of us. For me, there were several personal challenges to tackle during the first six months. This required me to go deeply within to understand and identify 'triggers' and embrace 'shadow work'. [READ: A Powerful Lesson from the Mahabharata]
[Image: Pixabay]
Truth be told, I didn't even realize that I have embraced shadow work till much later towards the end of the year when I read several posts on social media by influencers on the effectiveness of shadow work and inner child healing, both of which I took very seriously throughout 2019.
Reading the teachings of Sri Paramahansa Yogananda in his beloved disciple Sri Gyana Mata's book titled, "God ALONE" was a life changing experience. The book brought me closer to my Guru and taught me to confront the areas within me that required more love, clarity, understanding and much light.
Something as simple as silencing the constant inner critic also became a challenge in itself. Within all of us, the ego loves to play the role of the villain - the self-doubting critic that destroys inner light and confidence.
Some of the questions that I like to ask myself as I reflect upon the year that was include:
What have I learned differently this year?
How has this reflected in my life and helped me grow/not grow?
Lots of lessons to embrace. Let me share a few below:
Flow into yourself, accept your shadows
The most important lesson this year has been to flow into the person I am without any emotional or physical resistance and to identify my 'triggers', accept them and forgive myself for these triggers.
So, what are these triggers?
These are repetitive patterns in our emotional outbursts that we tend to believe are our logical reactions to external circumstances and challenges, but the spiritual seeker is wiser and knows that everything we react to stems from the inner world and the shadowy areas that inhabit our inner world.
A quote by Inner Practitioner on Twitter reflects this point with more clarity: "Sometimes you are not fighting with others. You are fighting with how you feel about them."
For instance, a child who grew up feeling 'abandoned' by parents will always be 'triggered' as an adult when he/she feels abandoned by a loved one. The trigger, though it may seem external, requires the adult to heal the inner child within whose wounds are still raw and require more love and light. This is just one example and there may be so many variations of this across the spectrum of the complex human mind.
Typically, we tend to deal with our 'triggers' by blaming others or external situations for our reactions. That is the kiss of 'Maya'. This allows us to believe that all the problems in our life are not really our fault but the fault of the rest of the world and connected to external situations that are thrown at us.
How convenient it is for our egos to blame all our problems on external factors when the truth is shadowed within?
The truth requires us to get ourselves out of the comfort zone and accept objectively how we react to external situations is uniquely based on the "inner work" we embrace within ourselves.
Meditation helped me to nurture a conscious awareness of these subtle aspects of one's thoughts. For instance, if I am angry or sad or tearful, instead of blaming a situation or a person or myself for it, I can bring my awareness to how I feel about something or towards someone. The moment I have accepted how and why I feel a certain way, my reaction to the feeling loses its strength or hold over me to cause further hurt or distress. Why? Because the ego cannot stand the mind to accept truth. The ego loves to confuse the mind with contradictions and conspiracy theories.
The "magic" lies in the fact that the moment you start studying the emotion or the 'trigger', it disappears. Why? As Ramana Maharshi used to remind his devotees, "Who is the I that is feeling sad, angry or upset? Think about it and you realize there is no I. The death of that 'I' is the beginning of awareness."
All teachings of wise Masters point to this ultimate reality. While this consciousness is difficult and challenging to nurture, I know that it has worked wonders for me to cultivate peace of mind. I hope this is useful for you as well.
Eat with higher awareness
Food, these days, is a highly politicized and sensitive topic. The biggest change that I embraced in 2019 was to eat with higher awareness and more responsibly.
Wondering how?
I began to listen to my body and changed my eating patterns accordingly.
I began to avoid food from outside.
I have also minimized my intake of carbonated drinks.
I eat raw food items like raw salads and nuts with at least two meals a day.
I also do deep breathing exercises while eating to boost my metabolism and digestion process.
A die-hard non-vegetarian and sea food lover that I am, I decided to turn a vegetarian on my birthday this year. Meditation helped me to not only decide this but it also gave me the will-power not to feel tempted by anything once I had made up my mind to listen to my body with a higher awareness.
The next big change relates to my daily intake of tea and sugar.
This may sound silly but I have always been addicted to endless cups of tea with lots of sugar for 'brain rush'. At one point, I used to drink at least six to 12 cups of tea with white sugar - imagine how I was poisoning my own body!
Again, meditation helped me to stop taking more than two cups of tea a day and it also endowed me with mental will power to replace white sugar with jaggery.
Results? I feel so much lighter within. My energy levels are balanced too and I feel as if my system is 'cleansing' itself from toxins after so many years of irresponsible and mindless eating patterns that were triggered by stress.
Setting boundaries
One of the big stress points in my life has been my inability to set boundaries. Result? I would tire myself out by taking out my time, energy and effort to be there to cater to those who want me to pitch in, almost to the point of emotionally and physically neglecting myself. By disrespecting and disregarding myself, I was mirroring a cue to the Universe on how to let others treat me and not value me. After all, think about it - if you don't value your time and energy, why would the rest of the world?
This habit had sapped all the energy out of me, affecting my mind and health for many years because I didn't believe in setting boundaries and found it difficult to turn down anyone.
In 2019, I made a conscious effort to interact only with those whose energies matched mine.
Note that the idea is not to lose friends.
The key point is to safeguard your own energy and spend it only on the things and the people that truly co-create beautiful experiences in your life.
In a sense, you are choosing what you want to manifest in your life with a sense of higher awareness.
A golden formula that worked wonders for me - Whenever you are confronted with negative energy from another person, the best way to tackle this is to withdraw your energy COMPLETELY from the source of discomfort.
By doing this one simple yet powerful thing, I honoured my time and my energy, and I found the Universe was beginning to send me a different tribe that resonated with my new found system of honoring and respecting my time and energy.
A beautiful quote from Changed Focus on Twitter:
"If you hold on to expectations, you will feel you have lost something once it's gone.
If you don't hold expectations, nothing is ever lost, and you are left with a peaceful acceptance of what is."
Another inspiring quote from Inner Practitioner: "When you realize that you are just a visitor to this world, you will stop trying to win the rat race, your heart will be open and the universe will send some people to help you. As your energy field grows, certain things written in spiritual books will become your inner reality."
What powerful and profound thoughts to wrap up 2019!
Now I look to you for your lessons. Share with me your reflections and lessons from the year that was.
As we head to 2020, I send out my loving gratitude and thanks to my Guru for his blessings and grace.
With all my heart, I wish you and your loved ones a very Happy and Blessed New Year.
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