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Showing posts from November, 2013

Why are women mean to women?

This is a question I have always asked myself several times based on the various 'encounters' I have: Why are women more mean to women?
This post here may shake you up:
1. Researchers say that women try to take down other women whom they perceive as rivals for male attention.
2. This happens in order to 'eliminate competition.'
3. The more attractive a woman is, the more likely she is to be a target for contempt.
Independent of the research findings, I want to share here some of my experience:
Some years ago, I was stranded in Mumbai airport because the pilot couldn't land in Delhi due to low visibility on the runway. So, the flight was diverted to Mumbai.  I was traveling alone and recovering very slowly from a bout of jaundice that had left me very weak and worse, my cellphone had developed some technical problem and I was unable to make calls. We reached Mumbai airport at about 12 am but were immediately whisked off in a bus to a hotel that was an hour away. 
I knew my…

Why Fear When I am here By Your Side?

The year is 1987. The place is Blantyre, Malawi in Africa.
A ten year old forlorn-looking girl sat by the school's pool side. Tears hover in her dark eyes, her chin trembles just a little and she looks defiant and defeated at the same time. 
If you look closely, you know that there is nothing remarkable about her features unless you see plain mousiness in new light. Her skin is the color of almond - slightly brown, neither too dark nor light. Her hair is a short mop of curls that you know cannot be tamed, just like her heart. 
Her father had bought her something for a school activity, telling her with utmost seriousness, "This costs a lot in dollars. Keep it carefully. Don't lose it. I don't think I have the money to buy you another one like this." 
On the very first day of bringing it to school, she had misplaced it and couldn't remember where she had last taken it. In her memory, she felt that it is by the pool. But she had looked all around the pool several ti…

What My First Job Taught Me & Why I didn't Learn Anything From It

When I first started my career, I made some grand assumptions about how I would transform the world, make it a better place and not compromise on my ideals or the values that define me as a person.
One year into my first job, I saw through my stupid notions and knew it is all bullocks! You know there is nothing else you can really do but turn a blind eye to the small-skirted, hardly-can-write-a-sentence, cleavage showing girl who is definitely closer to the top brass/caucus than you can ever possibly be. Even her voice, which when she talks to a person of the same gender is sharp like a seagull's mean cry, becomes - the most and only accurate way to put is like this - sexually provocative as though she is in the middle of an act...it's exactly what can turn the toughest man into mush in minutes. I have seen this happen countless times and wished a thousand times I didn't exist to see this repeat itself over and over again. 

But especially in the field of law and print book p…

Wake up time: There's no Woman in the Moon

How I love this awesome quote! Here it goes: 

Even the moon gets to put its feet up once a month. Man in the moon, of course. If it was a woman in the moon, she would never sit down, would she? - Allison Pearson
True, isn't it? Well, this almost sums up my typical day and don't you dare envy me for it! Okay, read on first:)
Sneak Peek into a Working Woman's Busy Routine
When your curtains filter in that soft beam of early dawn, DON"T even dream of snuggling back into the warm covers for even FIVE seconds...just run out of the covers as though your house is on fire...that way, you will get some exercise and burst off some sleepy calories too!
Rush to kitchen, make tea so that your fingers don't turn numb by the time you eat breakfast. Remember to twiddle your toes through the winter socks to make sure you know that you are still alive and kicking, if you know what I mean. Tip in the brat's ready-to-drink-after-boiled-milk and make sure you are generous with the suga…

Practice doesn't always make perfect

Brace yourself to read something crazy. You know what? I have always believed that when you have years of solid, dedicated practice with something, particularly in spirituality and in sadhana, it will come to you exactly when you need it.
Recently, a funny thing happened. A bus on which I was traveling suddenly overturned and no, I am safe, fine and nothing happened. Not a scratch or injury. 
But the funny thing is this: Instead of thinking of my Guru instantly or the mantra that I chant relentlessly, I thought of someone. I won't name the person because that is not relevant here. But, truly this is something I wouldn't have expected of me: wanting to reach out to that person just then. Those were my last thoughts at a critical moment.
How ridiculous it seems to me, as a spiritual seeker, that all that I could think of at that time was about someone! Not God, Guru or anything else.
Guess my practice of sadhana is simply not sincere enough. Or else, why would that happen?
Somehow th…

Shweta Menon Molestation is no Big Mystery, Happens with most women in Kerala

Last week, Shweta Menon hit the headlines across the nation and became the most talked about topic among Keralites in particular. I am not a fan of Shweta Menon and I can barely connect to the genre of movies that she does. But that has nothing to do with the fact that I feel quite angry and outraged by the way things have been snowballing against her simply because she had the guts to expose what had happened with her in broad daylight.  
Shweta Menon Molestation: The Reported Story
The reported story is that Shweta Menon attended a local boat race as the chief guest and after the event, she told the media that a local politician had sexually misbehaved with her during the event. Hell broke loose after she said this. 
Immediately after hearing this news, I told those who were with me at the time, "Within hours, she will withdraw her complaint." Okay, so no one believed me. 
I was told 'No, she's a fighter and she will not spare the politician' and 'She has mass …

Life's Lessons: What happens when you make mistakes of another kind?

We always know when we have blundered. The niggling voice of conscience is like a splintered wood embedded in our skin - it can't be lifted that easily. - Ismita Tandon Dhankher  (Source: Femina magazine)
Sometimes we do the wrong things for the right reasons but later a sliver of doubt resonates deep within and we find ourselves caught in a dilemma of sorts. The mind nudges you in one direction and the heart tugs you in another. Which one do you choose? Probably you would go with what is logical and feels right for your happiness, welfare and that of your family. 
But if you are a spiritual seeker like me, you would probably test your own level of perception and action by doing the unthinkable and seeing what it brings back into your life. In my case, I always go with the flow of the heart even in the trickiest situations. Yes, it means that I make more mistakes than others do. I like learning from those mistakes because it's all about engaging yourself with a learning curve. W…